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    Tennis
    25 September 2008
    You know you've been in the Middle East too long when...
    • You're not surprised to see a goat in the passenger seat
    • You think the uncut version of "Little House on the Prairie" is provocative
    • You think every one's first name is Al
    • You need a sweater when it's 80 degrees Fahrenheit
    • You expect everyone to own a mobile phone
    • Your idea of housework is leaving a list for the houseboy
    • You believe that speed limits are only advisory
    • You expect all police to drive BMWs or Merc's
    • You know whether you are within missile range of Iraq
    • You believe that the definition of a nanosecond is the time interval between the time the light turns green and the time that the guy behind you begins to blow his horn
    • You can't buy anything without asking for a discount
    • You expect all stores to stay open till midnight
    • You understand that 'wadi bashing' isn't a criminal act
    • You make left turns from the far right lane
    • You send friends a map instead of your address
    • You understand why huge 4x4s must slow down to a snail's pace whilst crossing a speed bump yet hurtle through a wadi at 100kph
    • You think that "Howareyou" is one word. So is "Mamsir"
    • You think it perfectly normal to have a picnic in the middle of a roundabout at 11pm
    • You know exactly how much alcohol allowance you have left for the month
    • You have a moon phase predictor on your computer
    • You never say Saturday instead of Friday or Sunday instead of Saturday anymore
    • You accept that there is no point in asking why you are not allowed to do something
    • You expect queues to be 1 person deep and 40 people wide
    • You realise that the black and white stripes in the road are not a zebra crossing, just bait to get tourists into the firing line
    • Seeing guys welcome each other with a kiss and hold hands while walking no longer distracts you
    • You carry 12 passport size photos around with you just in case
    • You can tell the time by listening to the local mosque
    • You think its a good night if there are fewer than 10 men for every woman in a bar
    • Phrases like 'potato peeler', 'dish washer', 'coffee maker' and 'fly swatter' are no longer household items but are actually job titles
    • You start to say "Insha'allah" when you actually mean "No f**king chance!"
    • Habibi isn't just the ex-president of Indonesia
    • You overtake a police car at 130KM/HRA
    • Problem with your car AC or horn is more serious to you than a problem with the brakes

    And last but not least: Why are there no dishwasher provisions in local villas? ... Because in local villas dishwashers are 'foreign made'.

    ;-)

    posted by Bravecat @ 11:11 am  
    11 Comments:
    • At 25/09/2008, 14:18, Blogger Solace said…

      LOL, very interesting and funny!

       
    • At 25/09/2008, 15:06, Blogger 3anooda said…

      LOOOOOOOL you mean foreign MAID

      well if u cant beat them join them eh!!

       
    • At 25/09/2008, 15:46, Anonymous QCat (from work) said…

      Solace,

      Glad you liked it!

      3anooda,

      I bet the foreign "made - maid" gave you a giggle ;-)

       
    • At 29/09/2008, 09:42, Blogger frogman said…

      very funny in a very depressing way... makes you wonder if things will ever change...

       
    • At 29/09/2008, 14:59, Anonymous Touchy said…

      You are crazy kitty !!
      Really Bravo !

      You made me lough a lone here like a crazy ...I didn't know that you are so funny :-)

      the most I laugh at is the one of blowing the horn after the light turnes green and the picnic in the middle of the roundabout ! LOL

      since you know all this, then you are on of us by now :-)

      Touchy

       
    • At 05/10/2008, 03:48, Blogger Mattâ„¢ said…

      You know, I've never had a picnic in the middle of a roundabout...

      make me think...

      :)

       
    • At 05/10/2008, 07:44, Anonymous QC (can't bother to login) said…

      Froggles,

      Why should they change? We love them just the way they are :P

      Touchy,

      Sorry to burst your bubble, sweets. This is not my creation. I got it from my ex boss in Doha :)

      Matt,

      Matt? Matt.... Matt... who are you again??? >:(

       
    • At 08/10/2008, 20:18, Blogger Panicos said…

      Love it:P maybe coming again to Dubai on January for soccer and at June for holiday, so I will see all this points:p

       
    • At 16/10/2008, 17:26, Blogger ammaro said…

      haha nuts! thats classic!

       
    • At 02/12/2008, 21:27, Blogger onlyinqatar! said…

      Too funny. I fell off my chair just reading it. Shared it with my hubby and we were crying with laugher... It's always good to find the humour in life especially here :)

       
    • At 16/12/2008, 20:09, Blogger John Galt said…

      You can tell you've lived here long enough when you are not all that surprised finding the dude at immigrations, screaming out loud beckoning people by their nationality:
      " Taa'la ya bakistani, taa'la ya hindi or taa'li ya filibino".
      Bas it's a very well thought out entry this.

       
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