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    29 January 2009
    How marriage is done in the Middle East - updated
    Advertisement in the newspaper:

    SEEK WALI OF BINT.
    Engineer, Mid-Twenty, Half European / Half Arab.
    Tall, Beard & Handsome.
    Nikah according to kitab and sunnah wanted.
    Contact: *******@yahoo.com



    For those not initiated:

    Wali of bint - someone with balls (wali) speaking for someone with vagina (bint) - as it is not nice for a good vagina bint to speak for herself
    Nikah - marriage contract
    Kitab - book (in this case, THE book)
    Sunnah - “the way and the manners of the prophet PBUH”

    And for those who are curious (or perhaps would like to respond to the ad): you can find it here - just scroll to the Matrimonials at the bottom of Page 1. The handsome bearded one must thank me for all the free publicity!

    ;-)


    Update: Oh and I just can't understand how in the society where a woman can't represent herself (honour, pride, traditions, etc), a woman can be raped by 46 men. So where is the honour? Where is the pride? Those same men probably negotiated on behalf of their daughters who they are to marry... I do hope they all die from AIDS.
    posted by Bravecat @ 9:50 pm  
    27 Comments:
    • At 27/01/2009, 11:24, Anonymous Anonymous said…

      How interesting. So you basically put an ad in a paper, and receive applications? Do women advertise themselves as well?

       
    • At 27/01/2009, 23:54, Blogger Dubai Guy said…

      When you live in closely knit societies like ours, it is really almost next to impossible & also impractical to marry a girl without the consent of her relatives. I believe this was the case in the West too till not so long ago. And I am sure the same will become norm here too once people start living independently, away from their families. But I hope that never happens :-)

       
    • At 28/01/2009, 06:50, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      Anon,

      Yes, there are ads of ladies as well, of course the ads are put by their male relative, and you contact this relative instead of a girl.

      Dubai Guy,

      I don't know what this has to do with "consent of the relatives", to be honest. I married with consent of my relatives, lol. So you are saying that you hope your young people never start living independently away from their families?? :)

       
    • At 28/01/2009, 16:58, Blogger Taras said…

      Horrendous!:(

       
    • At 28/01/2009, 21:07, Blogger Dubai Guy said…

      Qatar Cat: Yes, I don't want the young generation to dump their parents when they need them the most. I would never agree to marrying someone against the wishes of her parents. For our people, marriage between two people is marriage between two families & you need to have both sides of the family on board if you want things to go smoothly :-)

      Taras: You won't understand it unless you lived in our region :-)

       
    • At 28/01/2009, 21:46, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      Taras,

      It is indeed :(

      DubaiGuy,

      First - Taras was responding to the update on the post, not to the ad part.

      Second - there you go again about parental consent! Did I at any point speak against it? It wasn't even mentioned! Yes I know that in your society families interfere in all aspects of married couple's life, and therefore it is nice to have their consent. However, I couldn't care less about that, to be honest! It's nice to have their consent in any society. The subject of the post (except the update) is the hilarious ad, which even my Muslim friends found funny, and also my beef is (somewhat) with the fact that woman in this region must be spoken for.

       
    • At 29/01/2009, 17:57, Anonymous Anonymous said…

      I guess, you know what I think of it :-D
      So let me say about one thing only.
      "Tall, beard & handsome" - I trully feel sick of it!
      Is it a man?!!
      Fooo... :-(

      S.

       
    • At 31/01/2009, 19:17, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      Sever,

      Yes I know exactly what you think of it - I think the same!

       
    • At 02/02/2009, 18:10, Blogger I care said…

      I agree that it's dumb to search for a soul mate in means like the one you've mentioned.

      but why are you making a big deal out of this ?! the internet is full of match making websites !
      many many people all over the world use these websites !

      That guy just wanted to say that he doesn't want a relationship before marriage << which is seen wrong by many people over here.

      I, personally, don't agree with that but I'm jus trying to say that what the guy did isn't that bad, it happens everywhere !

      PlUS, bint means a girl and not vagina.

      excuse me, but don't change the meaning just to add a dramatic effect to your post.

       
    • At 02/02/2009, 21:06, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      I care,

      You are excused. I don't get why you are getting so dramatic, but hey, to each his own. To set the record straight, however, I never said "bint" means "vagina". Next thing, you'll claim that I said "wali" means "balls"!

      By the way, I don't think relationship before marriage is either wrong or right - whatever suits the couple, as long as nobody was forced into anything.

      As for why I was picking on the ad - NOT the fact that it was a matchmaking proposal, but the way the guy advertised himself. And I would have made fun of it whether it is a Muslim matrimonial or swingers proposition. It is just hilarious.

      Relax, mate. It's all tongue in cheek. Except the update.

       
    • At 03/02/2009, 13:54, Blogger I care said…

      in that case, i apologize :)

       
    • At 03/02/2009, 14:44, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      I care,

      You seem kewl. Lets get married :P

       
    • At 03/02/2009, 22:29, Blogger I care said…

      Great.. i'll post an ad in the newspaper and i'll wait for you to call me.

       
    • At 04/02/2009, 08:33, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      I care,

      Ah no no no, it doesn't work like that. I won't call you. Good bints don't!

      I'll get my wali to call you.

       
    • At 04/02/2009, 10:46, Blogger I care said…

      or maybe your wali should just email me when the wedding arrangements are over and i'll see you on the wedding day !

       
    • At 04/02/2009, 10:54, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      I care,

      What? No look-see?

       
    • At 04/02/2009, 11:03, Blogger I care said…

      nop, sorry.. ur a girl after all.. it doesn't matter what you think of your husband !

      :P and i don't care .. u'll be covered from head to toe all the time when i go partying !

      that's the arabs way..

      suffer !

      :P

       
    • At 04/02/2009, 11:09, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      I care,

      Haha apparently you know very little about the life of Arab girls in Qatar :P :P

       
    • At 04/02/2009, 11:38, Blogger I care said…

      LOL i don't even wanna know, i know i'll be sickened !

       
    • At 04/02/2009, 11:51, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      I care,

      Well not sure about sickened, lol, but after seeing the outfits local girls wear under their abayas, and especially when they go to weddings, and chatting with them about men and about what they do with their free time, I wouldn't exactly call them shy, haha.

       
    • At 04/02/2009, 23:00, Blogger I care said…

      Exactly, that's what meant !

      u never know what's under that niqab !
      people use it as a disguise.

      pretend to be shy because the culure forced this upon them .. and then when they take it of, they literally go wild :P

       
    • At 05/02/2009, 23:23, Anonymous Anonymous said…

      Pardon my intrusion, just wanted to say.
      This ad actually DOES NOT mean that the guy "doesn't want a relationship before marriage".
      Probably, he has had enough.
      But ok, nobody knows.

      And actually nothing wrong with searching a girl through magazines/sites/etc., but this ad... mmm... ok, just funny :-)

      Cat, behaviour!
      Let's call it "mothering instinct" :-D
      Unquiet Auntie :-P

      S.

       
    • At 17/02/2009, 22:25, Anonymous Anonymous said…

      Since u find our culture so appalling, why do you continue to live here/ Well, I guess tax free comes handy

       
    • At 17/02/2009, 22:42, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      Anon,

      I don't give a shit about what you think. You made two very far-fetched and incorrect assumptions about me. Therefore I can make one about you - and here it is: you are a moron.

      However, if you are the author of the "handsome, tall and beard" ad, or if you are one of the animals that raped the poor maid in Saudi and therefore found my post offending - then yes, I do find your personal culture appalling.

      And what the hell is tax free? Where is that? Oh yes, that must be in the country that charges me mega bucks for lousy internet, sub standard food and accommodation, and gives me no rights? Yeah tax free is really the top of my list.

      Go spread love elsewhere.

       
    • At 17/02/2009, 22:59, Blogger I care said…

      looooooool .. loved the comeback

       
    • At 18/02/2009, 07:08, Anonymous Anonymous said…

      "sub standard food and accommodation"

      And you still stick around for that? I wonder why

       
    • At 18/02/2009, 08:08, Blogger Qatar Cat said…

      Anon,

      I don't stick around for that. Nor do I stick around for so called "tax free". Honestly, I'd rather pay tax in my country and know that the money will go into roads, schools and medical care available to me, than overpay for everything here under the false "tax free" umbrella. And what I stick around here for - that is, my friend, none of your business. But thanks for your concern! ;-)

       
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